Sex Gets Real with Dawn Serra

Sex Gets Real with Dawn Serra Podcast

No fluff. No lies. Just sex as we see it.

Anne Hodder-Shipp on sex ed, entitlement in relationship, & recovery
tl;dr Anne Hodder-Shipp joins us to talk sex ed, entitlement in relationships, and sex after recovery and while sober.   News! If you could use some support around your relationship to your body, to pleasure, to sex and desire, I have a few spots available for in-person coaching in Vancouver and in my online virtual practice. Check out the Work With Me page for details. Patreon supporters - Anne and I spent some time recording a special bonus chat for you all about dream work and sex dreams. Head to pa...

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Anne Hodder-Shipp on sex ed, entitlement in relationship, & recovery
tl;dr Anne Hodder-Shipp joins us to talk sex ed, entitlement in relationships, and sex after recovery and while sober.   News! If you could use some support around your relationship to your body, to pleasure, to sex and desire, I have a few spots available for in-person coaching in Vancouver and in my online virtual practice. Check out the Work With Me page for details. Patreon supporters - Anne and I spent some time recording a special bonus chat for you all about dream work and sex dreams. Head to pa...

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Sex Gets Real 277: Cuckqueaning and the dangers of advice
tl;dr Creating community memories of abuse, why giving advice is a double-edged sword, attending ACA meetings, and wanting to cuckquean when you have trauma and no body confidence.   News! Save 40% off your first subscription with LOLA and your pads, tampons, wipes, condoms, and more can be discreetly delivered right to your door on YOUR schedule. They are generously sponsoring this episode. Listeners save 40% when they go to mylola.com and use promo code SGR at checkout. First up, I want your quest...

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Sex Gets Real 276: Attachment styles, cheating, & experimenting
News! I am on episode 4.2 of the Secret Feminist Agenda podcast. Tune in as I talk all about the Sex Gets Real podcast, how I got into this work, and much more. Save 40% off your first subscription with LOLA and your pads, tampons, wipes, condoms, and more can be discreetly delivered right to your door on YOUR schedule. They are generously sponsoring this episode. Listeners save 40% when they go to mylola.com and use promo code SGR at checkout. First up, I want your questions! I zoomed through so many of ...

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Sex Gets Real 275: Abuse in feminist port, finding body trust, and love stories
News! I am going to be on Secret Feminist Agenda podcast. The episode drops Friday, August 30, 2019 and if you haven't checked out this rad podcast yet, do it here. The next cohort of Power in Pleasure starts October 14th and enrollment is now open. If you'd like to learn more and join in this rich exploration of pleasure, hunger, and desire, head to dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. To get us started, I came across two threads all about love and the simple ways we care for each other. I'd love to hear from y...

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Sex Gets Real 274: Changing orgasms, dungeon etiquette, & codependency
News! I am now taking in-person clients in my coaching practice. If you're in the Vancouver area, I will working out of Allura Sex Therapy Centre on Fridays. Head to dawnserra.com to reach out to me if you're interested in grabbing a spot. The next cohort of Power in Pleasure starts October 14th and enrollment is now open. If you'd like to learn more and join in this rich exploration of pleasure, hunger, and desire, head to dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. This week's episode is all about you and your questi...

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Sex Gets Real 273: Crushing on a co-worker, book recommendations, & trouble speaking up
News! GET YOUR PRESCRIPTION FEE WAIVED at Simple Health if you'd like to try their online access for birth control and automatic subscription service with free shipping. Complete your health profile at simplehealth.com/sgr or use code SGR at checkout to get that $20 annual prescription fee waived and to get your birth control mailed to your door. I am now taking in-person clients in my coaching practice. If you're in the Vancouver area, I will working out of Allura Sex Therapy Centre on Fridays. Head to da...

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Sex Gets Real 272: Tristan Taormino on growing up, changing bodies, & whiteness
Before we jump into my conversation with Tristan, I want to take a few moments to share an important piece called: Dildon’t Disrespect Black Femmes: Our Personal Experiences With Wild Flower Sex Shop This piece, written collectively by Ev'Yan Whitney, Ashleigh, Karmenife, La'Shaunae, VenusCuffs, and Cameron Glover, is an important account of ongoing exploitation and abuse that these Black Femmes experienced at the hands of Wildflower Sex shop. It's also an important invitation to us all to think about who w...

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Sex Gets Real 271: Staying or going when you love two people, hating your vulva, & love across borders
News! I am now taking in-person clients in my coaching practice. If you're in the Vancouver area, I will working out of Allura Sex Therapy Centre on Fridays. Head to dawnserra.com to reach out to me if you're interested in grabbing a spot. The next cohort of Power in Pleasure starts October 14th and enrollment is now open. If you'd like to learn more and join in this rich exploration of pleasure, hunger, and desire, head to dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. It's you and me this week because I have so many ama...

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Sex Gets Real 270: Chris Maxwell Rose on touch and the erotic
LAST CALL The July cohort of Power in Pleasure starts July 21st, so this is the final DAY to register before it closes. You deserve pleasure. You deserve to honor your hunger. Your power is tied to your pleasure. Explore with us and learn more at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. Touch. The erotic. And healing. Chris Maxwell Rose is here from The Pleasure Mechanics and we geek out about touch, changing bodies and how our relationship with the erotic changes over time, touch hunger, and much much more. The Ple...

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Sex Gets Real 269: Sinclair Sexsmith and rife on 24/7 power exchange relationships
LAST CALL The July cohort of Power in Pleasure starts July 21st, so this is the final week to register before it closes. You deserve pleasure. You deserve to honor your hunger. Your power is tied to your pleasure. Explore with us and learn more at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. Sinclair Sexsmith and rife are here to talk 24/7 power exchange First up, you can hear me on two podcasts this week talking all about pleasure, bodies, and sex. I chatted with Chris Maxwell Rose of The Pleasure Mechanics all about p...

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Sex Gets Real 268: Redefining love, healing from relationship wounds, & self criticism
Your pleasure matters. Join the July cohort of  my 5-week online Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. Welcome to this week's episode, it's a very special treat, but first! Did you know you can support the show? You can, on Patreon. The show is entirely self-funded, so every single dollar makes a huge difference for me. If you support at $3 and above each month, you get exclusive weekly content you can't find anywhere else and if you support at $5 per mont...

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Sex Gets Real 267: A boyfriend who won't initiate, missing out on sex, & becoming a sex educator
FULL TRANSCRIPT AT sexgetsreal.com/ep267 Your pleasure matters. Join the July cohort of  my 5-week online Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. Welcome to this week's episode, full of your questions and some thoughts and questions I have in response. First up, a few years ago, Jasmine Kyon wrote an essay about why coming out is not the best option as the child of an immigrant family and how often the coming out narrative is white-centric and cis-centric. I...

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Sex Gets Real 266: Threesomes, men having boundaries, & becoming a sex educator
Your pleasure matters. Join the July cohort of  my 5-week online Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. My chat with Sinclair Sexsmith and rife got postposed, so this week's episode is just me and you. First up, I share about three new articles/resources that came across my feed this week. Head to sexgetsreal.com/ep266 for all of the links mentioned in the episode. Then, we dive into two important questions from listeners just like you. Peter is a cis man w...

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Sex Gets Real 265: "Straight pride", breaking relationship agreements, and sexual fantasies
Your pleasure matters. Join the July cohort of  my 5-week online Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. This week's episode is just me and you. First, I get on a soapbox about the bullshit that is "straight pride" and how it's really just like white pride and men's rights activists. We've got to call this stuff out and do better. Listener Rick wrote in to share some changes he's experienced in pleasure since really listening to his wife. AMAZING! Next up, C...

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Sex Gets Real 264: Getting a partner to dirty talk, crossdressing, and accountability updates
Your pleasure matters. Join the July cohort of  my 5-week online Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. This week's episode is just me and you. First up, some updates from the survivor pod around Franklin Veaux and hearing from more of the women. Definitely check out polyamory-metoo.com and Aida Manduley's twitter thread for some good stuff. You can also check out the Reddit thread with the comments I read here. Centering the stories and experiences of the ...

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Sex Gets Real 263: Aida Manduley on accountability and transformative justice
Want to work with me? Join the July cohort of the Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and pre-enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. My coaching practice has a few new spots available. If you could use support around the places where you feel most stuck, I'd love to support you. Details about my coaching practice are here: dawnserra.com/work-with-me . In a Sex Gets Real first, this episode is Part Three of a THREE part series featuring Eve Rickert, Samantha Manewitz, and Aida Manduley. This episo...

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Sex Gets Real 262: Samantha Manewitz on emotional abuse and gaslighting
Want to work with me? Join the July cohort of the Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and pre-enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. In a Sex Gets Real first, this episode is Part Two of a THREE part series featuring Eve Rickert, Samantha Manewitz, and Aida Manduley. This episode is my conversation with therapist Samantha Manewitz. We build on the conversation I had with Eve Rickert in Episode 261, exploring emotional abuse and gaslighting in relationships. One of the things Samantha stresses in ...

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Sex Gets Real 261: Eve Rickert on speaking out, celebrity culture, & harm
Want to work with me? Join the July cohort of the Power in Pleasure course. Check out details and pre-enroll at dawnserra.com/pleasurecourse. My coaching practice has a few new spots available. If you could use support around the places where you feel most stuck, I'd love to support you. Details about my coaching practice are here: dawnserra.com/work-with-me . In a Sex Gets Real first, this episode is Part One of a THREE part series featuring Eve Rickert, Samantha Manewitz, and Aida Manduley. This episode...

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Sex Gets Real 260: Play party etiquette, bra and panty fetish, and cutting of family after abuse
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Sex Gets Real 259: Accountability, women and older partners, & only wanting solo sex even when you're married
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Sex Gets Real 258: Healing from emotional abuse, a partner who doesn't want intercourse, & swinging
It's time to deepen your relationship with pleasure. Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 29, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. NEW: Transcript available at sexgetsreal.com/ep258 First, I apologize that this episode is so late. Between traveling, funerals, and getting caught up, it took a few extra days to get this uploaded and out to y...

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Sex Gets Real 257: Bratty submissives, being cheated on, & creative sex
Is your relationship with pleasure complicated? Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 29, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. On with the show! Anonymous shares how exploring and communicating with a partner can help open new possibilities to feeding your life and your relationship. Miss Submissive is hiring a professional Dominatrix and s...

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Sex Gets Real 256: M'kali-Hashiki on the erotic, safety, and healing
Is your relationship with pleasure complicated? Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 22, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. M'kali-Hashiki is here! Let's talk about erotic healing and more. M'kali-Hashiki works with people's erotic wounds and erotic breathwork. She has such wisdom and experience in exploring the erotic and also being wit...

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Sex Gets Real 255: Can you ask your partner to not watch porn and when a cheater gets cheated on
Is your relationship with pleasure complicated? Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 22, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. On with the show! I received a doozy of an email recently all about a partner who watches porn and the damage that's caused to their relationship. The story of their relationship is long, complicated, and full of pr...

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Sex Gets Real 254: Taking responsibility in relationship, living with an ex, and healthy relationship behaviors
NOW ENROLLING! Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 22, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. On with the show! First up, Graeme Seabrook's latest blog post popped up in my feed a few times this week and caught my eye. It's titled, "Stop Grading Your Husband On A Curve" and spoke so deeply to so many of the questions I receive and the coach...

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Sex Gets Real 253: Wanting to stop squirting, condom complaints, & finding feminist community
NOW ENROLLING! Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 22, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. On to your emails! Adam wrote back after hearing his email on the show with an emotional thank you. Beginning Gusher and Waterboarding Victim both wrote in with the same question from opposite perspectives. How can you prevent squirting? I share so...

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Sex Gets Real 252: A fiance who expects threesomes, anger management, & later-in-life first-time sex
NOW ENROLLING! Check out my new pleasure course which is enrolling now through April 22, 2019 (we'll enroll again in June!). It's called Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy and runs for five weeks online. I'd love to see you there. On to your emails! Kim wrote in with a sweet note about hearing a trauma story on episode 246 and how much it reminded her that she's not alone in her healing and trauma. Thanks for the support, Kim! Katie has a request. As someone who is a sex res...

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Sex Gets Real 251: Sex positive parenting, hiring escorts in a sexless marriage plus Shine Louise Houston
Two important things before we get started: Register for Explore More Summit, my free online conference! It starts February 25th, 2019 and the theme this year is PLEASURE. You do NOT want to miss it. Check it out here at exploremoresummit.com. Support Shine Louise Houston's crowdfunding campaign for her new erotic film, Chemistry Eases the Pain. Details are here. On to your emails! First up, CuriousMom was raised with a lot of sexual shame and body shame. As a mom of two daughters, she is doing her best t...

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Sex Gets Real 250: Embodiment, pleasure, and safety with Sage Hayes
Before we get started there's a huge thing you should know about: Explore More Summit 2019 is HAPPENING! The 4th annual free online conference is all about pleasure this year. You do not want to miss these conversations. They are incredible. Check out the line-up and register FOR FREE at exploremoresummit.com. Embodiment as our path to pleasure What are the ways we can access pleasure? What if pleasure isn't accessible to us? And how does trauma impact the body? Sage Hayes is here to tell us all about emb...

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Sex Gets Real 249: Tumblr alternatives, struggling with being on top during sex, & emotional outbursts
ONE BIG THING before we get started: Register for Explore More Summit! It starts February 25th, 2019 and the theme this year is PLEASURE. It's free and online, and you do NOT want to miss it. Check it out here at exploremoresummit.com. On to your emails! First up, where can people go for alternatives to Tumblr now that it's banned porn? I found two articles with many of the same recommendations. Check out the Refinery29 piece and the Cosmo piece (this one is by Elle Chase, known as Lady Cheeky). As always...

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Sex Gets Real 248: Sexual wildness, the erotic, and mythology with Leonore Tjia
Before we get started there are three HUGE things: This episode is generously brought to you by LOLA. Listeners get 40% off their subscription at mylola.com using discount code SGR. Have organic cotton pads, tampons, wipes, and even condoms delivered discretely to your door at exactly the interval you need for your body. When you use the discount code it helps the show so so much. We hit 5 MILLION downloads and to celebrate, I made a little video plus a huge giveaway. Three lucky folks will be randomly sel...

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Sex Gets Real 247: adrienne maree brown on pleasure activism
Before we get started there are three HUGE things: This episode is generously brought to you by LOLA. Listeners get 40% off their subscription at mylola.com using discount code SGR. Have organic cotton pads, tampons, wipes, and even condoms delivered discretely to your door at exactly the interval you need for your body. When you use the discount code it helps the show so so much. We hit 5 MILLION downloads and to celebrate, I made a little video plus a huge giveaway. Three lucky folks will be randomly sel...

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Sex Gets Real 246: Supporting an asexual teen, healing from trauma, & #SurvivingRKelly
Two things to get started: Grab the official Sex Gets Real recommended reading list now! Not only will you have access to my most recommended books, but it will add you to the show's newsletter which is going to be crucial as social media networks purge sex education from their pages. Enter to win "Girl Sex 101" and "Bad Dyke" by Allison Moon to celebrate the New Year! One lucky winner will be selected at random on January 15th, so enter now. U.S. and Canada folks only. This week's Patreon bonus is some y...

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Sex Gets Real 245: ALOK on body hair, art, friendship, legacy, & the violence of gender
Enter to win “Girl Sex 101” and “Bad Dyke” by Allison Moon to celebrate the New Year! Cut off for entries is January 15, 2019. One lucky winner will be selected at random , so enter now. U.S. and Canada folks only. Also, if you're looking for support around healing your relationship with your body, deepening your relationship with a partner, unpacking your desire, and finding more pleasure, I'd love to work one-on-one with you. Learn more at dawnserra.com. ALOK is here. It's time to question everything. ALO...

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Sex Gets Real 244: End of year giveaway, crossdressing neighbors, & dating a sister
Three things to get started: Grab the official Sex Gets Real recommended reading list now! Not only will you have access to my most recommended books, but it will add you to the show's newsletter which is going to be crucial as social media networks purge sex education from their pages. Enter to win "Girl Sex 101" and "Bad Dyke" by Allison Moon to celebrate the New Year! One lucky winner will be selected at random on January 15th, so enter now. U.S. and Canada folks only. See me speak FOR FREE about leavin...

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Sex Gets Real 243: Chronic pain, erotophobia, and community only spaces with Cameron Glover
Have you grabbed the Sex Gets Real official book list yet? Not only do you get all of the show's most recommended books, but you'll join the Sex Gets Real newsletter which is becoming more and more important as all sexuality discussions are banned on social media. Grab your goodie and stay in touch by heading to sexgetsreal.com/books Also, if you're looking for support around healing your relationship with your body, deepening your relationship with a partner, unpacking your desire, and finding more pleasur...

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Sex Gets Real 242: Rejecting romance, feeling sad about desire, poetry
Grab the official Sex Gets Real recommended reading list now! Not only will you have access to my most recommended books, but it will add you to the show's newsletter which is going to be crucial as social media networks purge sex education from their pages. You can also enter to receive a Merry Clitmas card from me to you. Ten lucky winners will be drawn soon. What a great week of listener questions! I can't wait to dive into these with you. But first, the episode ends with a beautiful fat acceptance poem ...

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Sex Gets Real 241: Andrew Gurza returns to talk disability, toys, & his mom
Want me to mail you a holiday card? Well, enter the Merry Clitmas card giveaway before December 18, 2018 and if you are one of 10 lucky names randomly drawn, I'll be hand-writing fun holiday cards and mailing them out the next day. Check out the details at sexgetsreal.com/holiday/ Welcome back, Andrew Gurza! When Andrew reached out to me asking to come back on the show, I immediately said yes. We always have so much fun chatting, AND I was delighted that it was an excuse to get to see his new documentary, P...

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EMERGENCY ALERT: Censorship and social media banning
Sign-up to stay in touch with the show if we get banned from social media and iTunes. Sex Gets Real Book List: http://sexgetsreal.com/books/ Explore More Summit: http://exploremoresummit.com Enter the holiday giveaway for a hand-written Merry Clitmas card: http://sexgetsreal.com/holiday/ Sweeping bans to social media means no more sex education. A number of sex educators have already had content flagged and banned on Facebook and Instagram. It may become nearly impossible for sex educators and podcasters to...

Sex Gets Real 240: Unprotected sex with herpes, long distance love, & coming out
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. It's me, my anxiety, and your emails. This...

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Sex Gets Real 239: Virginity, exploring non-binary gender, & being a cis man
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. It's you, me, and your emails.We're tackli...


Sex Gets Real 238: Birth, postpartum, and your inner jaguar
If you've been thinking about working with a coach around your desire, relationship, body, or shame, I am now accepting new clients and my rates are increasing January 2019. Learn more at dawnserra.com/work-with-me. The Fourth Trimester with Kimberly Ann Johnson Kimberly Ann Johnson is here this week to talk about birth injury and birth trauma, postpartum healing and nurturing, what cultures from around the world do to tend to folks after giving birth, and so much more. We explore changing bodies, cultural ...

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Sex Gets Real 237: Not coming out, asexual questions, & frustrated sex
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Frustration, fear, and feeling stuck? Your...

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Episode 236: Queer Kid Stuff
If you've been thinking about working with a coach around your desire, relationship, body, or shame, I am now accepting new clients and my rates are increasing January 2019. Learn more at dawnserra.com/work-with-me. This episode is sponsored by Simple Health, a new online service for birth control. You can have an online consult with a physician, get a prescription for birth control (even if you've never had one), and get your contraception mailed to you at no additional cost exactly when you need it. Liste...

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Sex Gets Real 235: Healing, resilience, & pleasure with Staci Haines
If you've been thinking about working with a coach around your desire, relationship, body, or shame, I am now accepting new clients and my rates are increasing January 2019. Learn more at dawnserra.com/work-with-me. Healing, survival, resilience, and how pleasure heals with Staci Haines Every once in a while, I have a conversation that brings things into focus. This week's conversation with Staci Haines one of those special experiences. I've long had Staci's book, "Healing Sex" on my shelf and used it as a ...

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Sex Gets Real 234: Feelings, emotional labor, and empathy with Kate Kenfield
If you've been thinking about working with a coach around your desire, relationship, body, or shame, I am now accepting new clients and my rates are increasing January 2019. Learn more at dawnserra.com/work-with-me. Why story hijacking and advice are rarely what the people we love need. Kate Kenfield is back and setting a new record for the show with her third stint as a guest. As a sex educator who is now diving deep into empathy, feelings, emotional intelligence, and self-care, we adore having brain sex a...

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Sex Gets Real 233: Jes Baker on fat bodies, sex, intimacy, & PCOS
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Jes Baker on Mormonism, sex, changing bodi...

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Sex Gets Real 232: Fantasies of harm, book lists, & political pleasure
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Listener questions on destroying a pussy, ...

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Sex Gets Real 231: Sensuality discovered with Ev'Yan Whitney
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Ev'Yan Whitney on sensuality, the erotic, ...

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Sex Gets Real 230: Pickup artists & the classics with Donna Zuckerberg
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Donna Zuckerberg on pickup artistry, Red P...

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Sex Gets Real 229: Pleasure and reproductive justice with Monica Raye Simpson
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Listener questions, pleasure, and reproduc...

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Sex Gets Real 228: Men's body trust and masculinity with Aaron Flores
Pleasure can be complicated, hunger can feel like a betrayal, but our bodies were built for pleasure and it's time for you to reconnect with what it means to feel good, to prioritize what brings you delight and joy, and to unpack the old stories that keep you stuck in shame and guilt. My new online course, Power in Pleasure: Reconnecting with Your Hunger, Desire, and Joy, will start enrolling soon, so join the notification list now and get first dibs on the course. Developing body trust, examining masculini...

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Sex Gets Real 227: Better sex through mindfulness with Dr. Lori Brotto
Have you been feeling stuck in your relationship, frustrated with your body, or totally disconnected from your pleasure & desire? One-on-one coaching spots are available in my private practice and rates are going up January 1st, 2019, so now is the perfect time to book a discovery call and learn more about how coaching might help you. Check out the clients I work with and my rates today.   The power of mindfulness on our pleasure, connection, and desire. In person interviews are some of my favorite, and Dr....

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Sex Gets Real 226: Period sex, who we find sexy, and #NotAllMen
Are you ready to sign up for Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop? Grab your spot today for just $37. Ten lessons, ten worksheets, a lifetime of shifting how you feel about boundaries. What if period sex is awful? How can we find different kinds of people sexy? And why so many men feel attacked when people talk about...well, men. There was a little change of plan at the last minute, which means this week I'm fielding a bunch of your emails. Want to hear your question read on the air? Just hit Send a...

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Sex Gets Real 225: Stella Harris helps us when we're tongue tied
Have you been feeling stuck in your relationship, frustrated with your body, or totally disconnected from your pleasure & desire? One-on-one coaching spots are available in my private practice and rates are going up January 1st, 2019, so now is the perfect time to book a discovery call and learn more about how coaching might help you. Check out the clients I work with and my rates today.   Communicating with ease about sex, love, and fantasies with Stella Harris. Stella Harris is a powerhouse in sex educati...

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Sex Gets Real 224: Entering the friendzone & male submission
Are you ready to sign up for Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop? Grab your spot today for just $37. Ten lessons, ten worksheets, a lifetime of shifting how you feel about boundaries. What even is the friendzone, how can a man come to terms with his submissive desires, and questioning desirability politics. This week it's just you and me before we have another tsunami of awesome guests.  First up, Angela wrote in with a question about friendzones. Why are they even a thing? Why did her friend sudde...

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Sex Gets Real 223: Virgie Tovar on fat dating, boundaries, misogyny, & diets
Do you struggle to say no without over-explaining? Do you feel hurt when people you love set boundaries that disappoint you? Are you looking for ways to stop apologizing and to start taking up more space? Well, Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop, is now available on demand. Grab your spot today.  Dating. Sex. Boundaries. Fat bodies. Virgie Tovar must be here! Virgie Tovar always makes me think and this chat is no exception. Holy smokes I love Virgie's brain, and she is going to take us into some B...

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Sex Gets Real 222: Sarah Thompson on body trust, pleasure, and non-binary identity
Do you struggle to say no without over-explaining? Do you feel hurt when people you love set boundaries that disappoint you? Are you looking for ways to stop apologizing and to start taking up more space? Well, Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop, is now available on demand. Grab your spot today.  Body trust, queer identity, pleasure in a fat body, and losing attraction for a partner with Sarah Thompson In a few days, I head to Portland for the ASDAH (Association for Size Diversity and Health) conf...

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Sex Gets Real 221: Andy Izenson on alternative justice, resilient relationships, & masculinity
Do you struggle to say no without over-explaining? Do you feel hurt when people you love set boundaries that disappoint you? Are you looking for ways to stop apologizing and to start taking up more space? Well, Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop, is now available on demand. Grab your spot today.  Radical love, resilient community, and never being discarded with Andy Izenson I am so excited by this week's chat with Andy Izenson. I first saw Andy speak several years ago at a closing panel for Woodhu...

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Sex Gets Real 220: Body trust. Trans sex woes. Self-harm scars.
Are you ready to sign up for Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop? Grab your spot today for just $37. Ten lessons, ten worksheets, a lifetime of shifting how you feel about boundaries. A passionate lover. Body trust. Trans sex woes. Self-harm scars. Hello from Portland! I am here for BeNourished's Reclaiming Body Trust Intensive and it is hitting me hard. I'm still processing so much, and while I talk about the experience a bit this week on the show, I have some REALLY JUICY TIDBITS about trauma, bo...

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Sex Gets Real 219: Painful anal, a husband who says she's "too fat", & confronting resentment
Are you ready to sign up for Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop? Grab your spot today for just $37. Ten lessons, ten worksheets, a lifetime of shifting how you feel about boundaries. Intersex-inclusive language. Resentment in relationships. Questions from YOU! I am loving answering your questions this summer, and I'm so glad I'm getting a chance to get caught up on the backlog. Resentment is something that comes up a lot in my coaching practice. People tend to harbor all kinds of resentment withou...

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Sex Gets Real 218: Tender masculinity, condom expiration dates, & Dommes who receive
Do you struggle to say no without over-explaining? Do you feel hurt when people you love set boundaries that disappoint you? Are you looking for ways to stop apologizing and to start taking up more space? Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop, is now available on demand. Grab your spot today for just $37. Ten lessons, ten worksheets, a lifetime of shifting how you feel about boundaries. Tender masculinity, condom expirations, and your questions answered. I recently came across an article called "In P...

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Sex Gets Real 217: Nadine Thornhill on saving comprehensive sex education
Do you struggle to say no without over-explaining? Do you feel hurt when people you love set boundaries that disappoint you? Are you looking for ways to stop apologizing and to start taking up more space? Well, Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop, is now available on demand. Grab your spot today.  Nadine is saving comprehensive sex ed Ontario Canada recently elected a conservative leader named Doug Ford. One of his campaign promises is to roll back the comprehensive sex education program for Ontari...

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Sex Gets Real 216: Boring sex, calling masturbation cheating, & stolen sex toys
Heard about it on the show? The Sex Map game is just $9 and can be purchased here. Your questions. Answered. Katie has a new fat fling. She really likes him, but he talks about diets and weight loss a lot. She's been learning about diet culture, health at every size, and fact activism, so she needs help on how to set some boundaries with him to prevent discussions about the very things she's trying to overcome. Loving Husband has lost his sex drive. On top of that, his wife only wants sex in the missionary ...

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[REPOST] Sex Gets Real 173: Riley J Dennis on trans identity
Guess what? I'm still in China. Because if you're going to travel halfway around the world, you want to stay a bit. Here is a yummy Pride-related replay of my fantastic chat with Riley J Dennis. Riley J Dennis is someone I’ve been watching on YouTube for a little while and completely admiring. I adore her passion for anti-oppressive work, talking about feminism, politics, sex, trans issues, and a bunch more. So, I decided to reach out and invite her on the show. When she said yes, I immediately went to work...


[REPOST] Sex Gets Real Episode 177: Lola Davina on thriving in sex work
I'm in China on vacation, so this week we are replaying a popular episode from the past. This one is Lola Davina on thriving in sex work since it was International Whores' Day on June 2nd. How can you thrive as a sex worker, navigating the fact that you have no real safety while also performing erotic fantasies and sex at the same time? How can you care for yourself as clients bring in their pain, shame, and fear and expect you to heal them?  Lola Davina is here to help us answer those questions and more. H...

Sex Gets Real 215: Shadeen Francis on trust, honesty, & cheating
Do you struggle to say no without over-explaining? Do you feel hurt when people you love set boundaries that disappoint you? Are you looking for ways to stop apologizing and to start taking up more space? Well, Take Up Space, my online boundaries workshop, is releasing soon. Grab your spot today.  What if honesty isn't the best policy for rebuilding trust? Shadeen Francis recently spoke at Explore More Summit, and her talk was one of the fan favorites for the entire conference. Her formula for trust challen...

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Sex Gets Real 214: Foot fetish, a husband who refuses sex, & tell tale orgasm signs
Three links to get you started: Ready to pre-order my boundaries workshop? Check out details for "Take Up Space: A Workshop on Boundaries, Self-Worth, & Strengthening Your Relationship With Self" Want free feminist porn? Enter this week's giveaway here. Deadline is Saturday, May 27th. The Sex Map game is just $9 and can be purchased here. Your questions. Answered. Bug has a funny sex toy story and wanted to share it. Beware of Pop My Cherry, folks. Regis looked up the definition of orgasm and it includes ...

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Sex Gets Real 213: Is porn destroying this relationship? Plus gender roles, sex toys, & NRE.
Dreaming of quitting your day job to start your own business? Join the free virtual training, True Freedom Symposium: The When, What, Why, and How to Quit Your Day Job and What's Really On The Other Side, starting May 14th. It's free, online, and I'm a speaker alongside Modern Family's Ed O'Neill, Dinner and a Movie's Paul Gilmartin and the amazing Pam Slim of "Escape From Cubicle Nation." Sign up here. Your questions. Answered. Ana just started graduate school. She's working on becoming a sex educator, and...

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Sex Gets Real 212: Secret fantasies, hating a partner's body, & virgins
Did you miss Explore More Summit 2018? Not to worry. All of the talks are available for you to bring home, plus some yummy bonuses! See your options and explore your more in life, love, and sex: exploremoresummit.com. It's time for more listener questions. You know I love talking with super smart awesome folks on the show, and I also adore fielding your questions. So that's what we're doing this week - your questions. Jon thinks he might be bisexual. What should he do? Pete wants to try pegging, but he is u...

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Sex Gets Real 211: Amy Jo Goddard on sex, power, & leadership
SIGN UP NOW! Explore More Summit 2018 is happening now. It ends May 2nd, so grab your all-access pass for free before it's too late. exploremoresummit.com. What is changing in the wake of the #MeToo movement? How do we talk about sex and power? Amy Jo Goddard is joining me this week to talk about BIG things. Amy Jo is a powerhouse of change, fierce and uncompromising in her commitment to sexual liberation and social change. I've been working with her on her Sex, Power, and Leadership Conference - which is a...

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Sex Gets Real 210: Jen Cross on healing trauma, dissociation, & the erotic
SIGN UP NOW! Explore More Summit 2018 starts in just a few hours and runs for the next 10 days. It's free and online. Grab your ticket now at exploremoresummit.com. What if we could not only write ourselves whole after trauma, but write our way into the erotic and desire? This week, Jen Cross, author of "Writing Ourselves Whole: Using the Power of Your Own Creativity to Recover and Heal from Sexual Trauma," is here to talk about healing and the power of the page. Let's start with the giveaway! Jen generousl...

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Sex Gets Real 209: Sexual pain & dissociation, virginity, & sex apps
Eager to sign-up for this year’s Explore More Summit? It kicks off April 23rd, 2018 and you can enroll for free at exploremoresummit.com. It's your questions this week, folks, and there are so many amazing ones to get to. KiltmanFL wrote in about AC's question in episode 203 wanting kink classes in Florida. Kiltman has some great resources for all you Florida listeners. Bee wrote in with a long thank you note, but basically Bee was inspired to have some really scary conversations with her partner and now so...

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Sex Gets Real 208: Sexual liberation & intersectional sex ed with Roan Coughtry
Eager to sign-up for this year's Explore More Summit? It kicks off April 23rd, 2018 and you can enroll for free at exploremoresummit.com. What is intersectional sex ed? What does sexual liberation look like? This week, I'm joined by Roan Coughtry, a super rad sex educator who believes in having big conversations about how our pleasure and our bodies are impacted by the larger systems of our culture. We talk about Roan's beautiful personal statement for Trans Day of Visibility and how Roan started finding la...

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Sex Gets Real 207: Sobriety, changing a partner, & fetishizing male virgins
Are you joining us for the 3rd annual Explore More Summit? It kicks off April 23, 2018 and it's free and online. Grab your spot now at exploremoresummit.com. We did it. We did a live recording of the show with about a dozen of you joining in the fun. So, this is your chance to not only hear me fielding questions live, on the spot, but you'll also hear other people's thoughts and perspectives, too. I had a blast and I hope we do it again soon. So what did we chat about? DL has found that pleasure, sex, and e...

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Sex Gets Real 206: Witches, sluts, and feminists with Kristen Sollée
Eager to sign-up for this year's Explore More Summit? It kicks off April 23rd, 2018 and you can enroll for free at exploremoresummit.com. Are you a witch, a slut, or a feminist? Then this episode is for you because Slutist founder Kristen J. Sollée is here to chat with me, Dawn Serra, about her new book by ThreeL Media, "Witches, Sluts, Feminists: Conjuring the Sex Positive." I'm not sure how much I've talked about it on the show, but I spent several years in my early twenties in a very close-knit witches c...

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